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I’ve got a goldfish as a very belated birthday present from SY and HY.

I think that fish is semi-retarded  somewhat intellectually challenged, possibly like me, with a need for huge spaces because it keeps knocking its big orange head against it’s tank.

And I’ve realized the following:

1. It eats not as much as I had imagined.

2. It shits A LOT MORE than what I had imagined.

3. I had to change the water rather frequently because the fish shits sooooo much, from all the food my brother has been giving it, and I simply can’t stand the sight of long shits floating around in that bloody small tank.

Apparently, goldfishes are the fish who shits the most, kois, considerably lesser, but they are HUGE. Okay, not really, but they can really grow.

Anyway, I love the goldfish, shit and all of it!

I think the birds all got blown by the wind and rain to another country or what. They are not bothering me anymore by squawking insanely in early mornings and letting me sleep in! Oh glorious sleep.

What’s left to do is my RWP essay (edits only!) and my dozen of HTA essays and that longish HTA essay (which is different because that is 10x longer that the dozen I need to do D: )

I’m running out of time. ): Now I do understand why some people feel 24 hours a day is too short.

I don’t even have time to procrastinate anymore now because it’s a ‘get-it-done-and-get-it-done-now’.

I space periods of time according to datelines. I try to finish everything in the studio so that when I go home I don’t have to use the lousy desktop at home to cad. It’s painful.

Sleep is something I wouldn’t compromise on, because I’ve been conditioned to sleep early and wake early. It’s all a part of me. To meddle with that is like to meddle with my being. I can get totally cross and explosive.

Then comes the family time. After Mum’s passing I’ve been placing my family as the number 1 priority, so it can get totally squeezy at times, but I try to negotiate. It’s getting harder and harder.

I guess it was part of growing up, accepting more responsibilities and taking on a job. But I’m still trying yet. Like a kite, no matter where the winds blow me, the string that made that possible would always follow. I would always remember who and what made that happen.

I wish to be grounded all my life. I hope I would never change. But Dad keeps saying it’s only the beginning of it all. I am feeling slightly battered, I only want to be able to take everything life throws at me.

If I can have one wish, I just wish when it all ends, I can still go back to where I feel I belong.

If I am the government of my imaginary world, I’d have laws for the weirdest things.

1 – Birds shall not perch near people’s air conditioner ledges.

2 – Birds shall not squawk loudly between the times of 12am to 12pm when there are residential buildings in the birds’ 20 metre radius.

3 – Birds shall not perch on people’s windowsills.

4 – Birds shall not enter people’s homes unless it is being domesticated.

If I were to rule the world, nobody would be awaken early due to noisy birds making a din outside.

I read the e-book, The Pursuit for Happiness. It’s so eerily similar that I would feel immensely sad when I’m reading it.

I feel I’m not reading the thoughts of some fictional character, but reading what resides in my brain. It’s so spooky and freaky that the random surge of emotions through me made me feel like chucking it all away, but I can’t.

It’s so similar, it’s so true, so unreal that I can’t run away, only to be held captive by it.